E162 Sue Willoughby A Well Rounded Life
Let’s Be Well Together Podcast - Episode 162
Date: March 4, 2025
Participants: John Webster and Riley Thompson
Guest: Sue Willoughby
Start Times and Segments:
[0:00:35] What’s On Your Mind: . Riley is being worn down by hustle culture. John wonders whether what’s driving the work makes it either hustle culture (not great) or rewarding hard work.
[0:12:17] Expanding Minds Interview: Sue Willougbhy lives a well-rounded life. It’s included fun and challenging things like being a DJ, a stand-up comic, a boxer and a roller derby referee. Diverse life experiences get her out of her comfort zone. It’s not easy to get out of your comfort zone and try new things. Part of it is understanding why you feel stuck. Are you really not happy with your life? Is it that you want to try something new and you just don’t know where to start? You can take little bites when they try something new. Sue calls them tortoise steps. If you watch a tortoise, it steps then stops then steps then stops. Just do something different – one thing – every day for a week and see how that feels. Being well-rounded helps her to develop resilience. It took a long time for her to realize, “Oh, that was a lesson that I needed to learn.” It’s not about having a thick skin. It’s not about deflecting. It’s about having an experience, taking it in, sitting with it, then realizing, “Oh, that makes sense.”
[0:30:50] Running Popup: John discloses a secret project he mentioned in 2024. It felt great and changed his perspective to find and organize old computer photos and docs over the years.
Quotes and Take-Aways:
Sue – I experienced discomfort when I was growing up. I went through challenging situations. At least I had my sense of humour. I took that sense of humour and went on stage as a stand up comic. It was nerve wracking on a good day, but it was an experience. Talk about putting yourself out there. That is the ultimate put yourself out there type of thing.
Sue – Diverse life experiences have helped me. It’s a learning experience for me. It gets me out of my comfort zone. There’s no reason to not try something new. Ask yourself, what’s the worst thing that can happen? Will you regret not trying it? I have some very rich, beautiful life experiences an I’ve become part of weird little subcultures that many people don’t know exist. I believe it’s given me so much life experience that I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
Sue – Sometimes it’s not easy to get out of your comfort zone and try new things. Part of it is understanding why you feel stuck. Are you really not happy with your life? Is it that you want to try something new and you just don’t know where to start?
Sue – I help people understand that you don’t need to go all in. You can take little bites when they try something new. I call them tortoise steps. If you watch them, they step then stop and step then stop. We get so habitual. We drive the same way to work. We eat the same food. We wear the same clothes. Take a little diversion. Take a different way home. See how that feels. Do something that will push you slightly out of your comfort zone. Have an accountability partner. Have someone do something different with you. Just do something different – one thing – every day for a week and see how that feels.
Sue – We don’t celebrate little tortoise steps enough – the little victories. It’s all about making those micro shifts – those micro changes. It goes back to awareness. What awareness can I build? Give yourself a high five if you didn’t eat that extra food today. Celebrate what you can accomplish. Then you know, “I did that.”
Sue – Being well-rounded helps me to develop resilience. I’ve been through a lot in my lifetime. I realized things and not only through the things I’ve done. It took a long time to get to the point where I could realize, “Oh, that was a lesson that I needed to learn.” We don’t need to beat ourselves up when things don’t turn out the way we had anticipated. We don’t need to look at it as a failure. We can think about it as an experience I had or a lesson I learned. We can keep that in mind for next time. We can build up resilience.
Sue – It’s not about having a thick skin. It’s not about deflecting. It’s about having an experience, taking it in, sitting with it, then realizing, “Oh, that makes sense.”
Guest Information: Sue Willoughby is the Founder of Willoughby Coaching, where women over 40 confront personal obstacles and change the trajectory of their lives. Raised by a single alcoholic parent, Sue struggled with low self-esteem and learned from an early age to be self-sufficient and embrace discomfort. She came out at the age of 17 and struggled to find her place in the gay community, attempted suicide at 19, and was on a path of living hard and playing harder. Sue found coaching through her lifelong love of horses. They were always there to support her through some of the darkest and most difficult times of her life and she now finds fulfillment in being the coach she wished she had in those challenging times of her life. Sue resides outside the Seattle area with a horse named Moose, two mini-longhaired Dachshunds, Benny and Buddy, and a VW Bus called Arlo.
Website: www.willoughbycoaching.com
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/suewilloughby
Instagram: @sue_willoughby
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Thanks for joining us,
(-(-_(-_-)_-)-) Your wellness check-in team
John, Sammy, Cameron, Sheila, Elise, Isabelle, Noura, Julie and Riley