E050 David Edey Will Planning to Help Executors

Let’s Be Well Together Podcast - Episode 50
Date: January 10, 2023

Participants: John Webster, Sammy Damaren, Cameron Earnshaw and Sheila Webster
Guest: David Edey (Interview) and Rania Atif (Move That Body)

Start times and Segment Segments:

[0:00:38] What’s On Your Mind: Sammy and John chat about a Mental Health Commission of Canada post about four self-care tips: feel the feelings; gratitude journal; five senses; and sleep schedule. They talk mostly about journaling and feeling the feelings.

[0:17:57] Expanding Minds Interview: [Economic Wellness] David Edey talks about the process of naming an Executor when making a Will. The Executor works with beneficiaries and settles the estate. David is a Certified Executor Advisor and author of the book Executor Help: How to Settle an Estate Pick an Executor and Avoid Family Fights. He has personal experience with problems an Executor can face. He learned valuable lessons, including that it helps to communicate with family members and the Executor when you are making your Will (before your pass away). We learn about some of his experiences and ask about some tips for people in this context: 1. share their wishes with their families; 2. pre-book their Executors (talk to them in advance); 3. talk to advisors (accountants, lawyers, etc.) about what they hope to achieve in their Will;  4. ask Executors to communicate with beneficiaries during the process of dealing with an estate; and 5. tell Executors where digital passwords are located.

[0:29:39] Adventures of the Starving Artist: It’s that time of year when we often reflect back. Cameron reflects back on a short film project he started working on in 2019, which is getting closer to completion. His work centered on jazz music.

[0:34:51] Move That Body: Rania Atif is a busy university student. Much of her work involves sitting at a desk. She enjoys walking not only for the exercise and as a break from study, but for the freedom of mind. She lets her thoughts flow. Rania also enjoys rock climbing.

[0:41:09] Running Popup: A news story snuck into John’s mind –thoughts of revenge are distracting and make it very hard to live in the present moment. It’s important for many wellness exercises for us to live in the moment and make the most of each minute.

[0:43:00] Flipside of the Coin: We talk about an interesting article: “A for attractive: Good-looking female college students saw their grades DROP during Covid pandemic 'when professors couldn't see their faces', study claims”, by Mansur Shaheen.

Quotes and Take-Aways:

Sammy – I’ve heard from some people to treat a feeling like it’s passing through. It comes. You acknowledge it. You accept it. You maybe do some digging on why you’re feeling this way and then it keeps going. I think it’s important when you’re feeling your feelings not to dwell in negative ones, because you will get totally consumed by them.

David – You want to make sure you start to have those conversations with your family, organize your estate and put in place the mechanisms and processes to help your executor settle the estate as quickly as possible, but also let your family members know what your wishes are. Don’t wait until you’re not longer here and the paperwork is doing the taking for you.

David – Many heads of families don’t want to have conversations with their children about their wishes, because they don’t want to have any hurt feelings. So they let the paperwork do the talking.

David – Sometimes the testator is under the illusion: “My family gets along at holiday time. We just love each other. There’s no reason for us to have morbid conversations”. They avoid and procrastinate and never tell their children about their wishes. When you resist that and don’t share what your thoughts are, you’re not putting your family in danger of becoming disorganized and be left in chaos.

David – Before you make any decisions that impact your estate or future generations, you need to talk to professionals to ensure that everything makes sense in terms of how it will affect the estate.

David – As an executor, I urge you not to pay out beneficiaries first and then do the taxes, because if you come up short you’re held liable personally to pay taxes. It’s then difficult to collect that money back from beneficiaries you already paid.

David – You really don’t know about someone until you have to share an inheritance with them.

Bulletin Board Quote brought to you by Sammy: I should know these. I think we learned them in kindergarten.

Guest Information: David is a Certified Executor Advisor (CEA) who has worked in the financial planning industry in Montreal for more than 35 years. He is the author of the book Executor Help: How to Settle an Estate, Pick an Executor and Avoid Family Fights. He also hosts a podcast called Executor Help Podcast. David has personal experience with problems an executor can face. He spent seven years and $50,000 in lawyers’ fees, plus made 10 court appearances to settle his parents’ will with a sibling. He learned valuable lessons.

David’s Website: https://www.davidedey.com/
Links to sites to buy book: https://www.davidedey.com/buyexecutorhelpbook.html

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Thanks for joining us,
(-(-_(-_-)_-)-)   Your wellness check-in team
John, Sammy, Cameron, Sheila and Julie

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E049 Frederick Fuller Paint Through Grief Workshop