E086 Jodi Skeates Helping Widowed People
Let’s Be Well Together Podcast - Episode 86
Date: September 19, 2023
Participants: Elise Seifert, Julie Wilson, John Webster, Cameron Earnshaw and Sheila Webster
Guest: Jodi Skeates
Start times and Segments:
[0:00:35] What’s On Your Mind: It’s a topic we come back to – what are the energy givers? What are the energy takers? A social media posts lists many.
[0:08:06] Expanding Minds Interview: [Mental Wellness] It’s part 2 of our interview of Jodi Skeates, whose husband died unexpectedly at age 52 in a scuba diving accident. As she works through her grief, Jodi is giving back and helping other widowed people, including through Soaring Spirits Canada and Camp Widow Toronto. She’s tells herself and us to “keep breathing and make each of those breaths count”, which is similar to our goal to “live life in every breath”.
[0:24:44] Adventures of the Starving Artist: Cameron spent some time in his hometown, Cambridge, then headed to the Toronto Air Show.
[0:29:48] Move That Body: We discuss an article on the benefits of walking: “Could walking extend your lifespan? – study”, by Judy Siegel-Itzkovich (Aug. 9, 2023). A study shows that any amount of walking can help. More walking means more health benefits.
[0:35:51] Running Popup: The humble people John knows are strong. Humble is strong, not weak.
[0:36:36] Flipside of the Coin: Elise and Stephen experienced a scare when the house beside their’s caught fire.
Quotes and Take-Aways:
Jodi – I decided to take a leap of faith and go to Camp Widow Toronto, not knowing what to expect. In the three days of the event, my life was changed in wonderful ways that I could never have anticipated.
Jodi – I was drawn to a Camp Widow workshop on Trauma. I felt I needed to go. I came out of that workshop with a different understanding of trauma than I had when I went in. I was thinking it was my husband who had suffered a traumatic death. I thought we would discuss that trauma. What I learned in the workshop is that I had gone through a traumatic experience. I was the one suffering from some of the hallmark symptoms of PTSD and I had some tools that I could take away and help myself recover from my traumatic experience. It really shifted where I was in my widowed journey.
Jodi – When you go to Camp Widow you’re constantly meeting people who’ve had a sliver of the experience as you, yet their experience is entirely different.
Jodi – A lot of people hold the stereotype that you become a widowed person after a lengthy marriage. There are a lot of widowed people who get disenfranchised simply because they were in a non-traditional marriage or a same-sex relationship. Maybe they were not married and living common law. Maybe they were separated and their partner died before they were divorced. Some widowed people get disenfranchised in their grief because they don’t meet that traditional stereotype of what we think a widowed person should be. Camp Widow has a very broad definition on the term “widow”. It’s non-secular. It’s open to anyone who identifies as losing the person they thought they were going to spend the rest of their life with.
Jodi – Scott’s death made me realize how precious and fragile life is. Your life could end in five breaths. Life is precious and shouldn’t be taken for granted. I didn’t die. It was Scott that died. I refuse to let Scott’s death be my destruction. I know I can’t grow old alongside Scott, but as I continue to age I can continue to grow. I’ve really tried to honour Scott and the love we had for each other, but gently release the plans we had and find a new path forward in life. I’ve really focused on the things that make me happy and will allow me to live to a healthy old age.
Jodi – I also don’t say no to new challenges.
Bulletin Board Quote brought to you by Jodi: It was nice to talk to people about how irritating that questions is.
Guest Information: Over her career, Jodi has provided legal support to the life and health insurance industry. She has served as in-house Senior Counsel for several Canadian financial institutions as well as the Canadian Life and Health Insurance Association. As a government lobbyist, she’s represented the industry on timely issues such as privacy, genetic testing, medical assistance in dying, gender identity and expression discrimination. Jodi retired from full-time in-house legal practice earlier this year and is now working part time as a litigator with Fasken, a large Canadian law firm with offices across the country and affiliations with firms around the world. She lives in Burlington, Ontario. Jodi is a founding Director and Chair of the Board of Directors of Soaring Spirits Canada and serves as Secretary to the Board of Director of the Niagara Grape and Wine Festival.
Links to further information:
Soaring Spirits Canada
Camp Widow Toronto
Soaring Spirits International Regional Social Groups
Soaring Spirits International Men’s Community Specific Group
Soaring Spirits International LGBTQ+ Community Specific Group
Soaring Spirits International Widowed & Black Community Specific Group
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Thanks for joining us,
(-(-_(-_-)_-)-) Your wellness check-in team
John, Sammy, Cameron, Sheila, Elise, Isabelle and Julie